Here’s something I wrote about faith for the greenbelt blog about a billion years ago.
Thomas Merton said “faith is a matter of questioning and struggle before it becomes one of certitude and peace”. (As always someone else got there before me and said it much better than me but I adore the quote) It’s wrestling Jacob style all night long, it’s being Amelia Earhart dying to fly, and it’s heading for an unknown horizon looking for India but finding America instead.
I both admire and am slightly bewildered by people who are so certain of hearing God’s voice or knowing their destiny in God. My experience of faith is one of uncertainty and possibility- these afford me a chance to ponder, wonder and dream. All this time isn’t spent daydreaming or doodling- it’s a form of prayer or meditation. Previously in life my faith experience always felt an arms length away from me- I wasn’t really in any danger of burning with passion about something. Now my faith is a living, breathing thing, it’s visceral, its blood, and it churns. Faith for me is an expression of something internal; it’s something that requires oxygen, interaction and light. I guess that’s why the Carpenter spoke of mountain moving mustard seed faith.